Well, the countdown is now in hours instead of days. 23 hours from now, I'll be getting all sewn up after the birth of my second child. How weird to have childbirth so scheduled, organized, and planned. How dare I know the exact half hour in which my child will be born? Feels like I'm trying to play a role that should only be reserved for God, but everyone's intentions are for the good of me and the baby, so I'm sure God is still smiling.
This time around, I feel a lot more unprepared from a "setup" perspective (we still have things to get around, put together, and situated even today, instead of being weeks ahead of the game) but I feel so much more calm about the arrival of a new baby in general. Instead of all the uncertainty of unknown labor, child birth, and recovery, I know exactly what's going to happen and how it's going to feel, so now I get to focus all my pre-birth thoughts on how wonderful it's going to be to finally meet this beautiful baby face to face.
22.5 hours from now.
I enjoyed being at home during Caroline's last week as an only child. I was still working, but working with Caroline at my elbow is so much more fun, and at least gives me the illusion of spending quality time with her. I realized this week how much she truly has grown and learned and developed. Much more than I had previously given her credit for. Having the opportunity to discover, once again, how truly amazing Caroline is was a real blessing this last week.
Starting tomorrow, our collective world will be turned upside down, but we will roll with the punches, one day at a time. I'm certain I'll be proud of every single member of this family. That seems to be the trend anyway, from my limited 2.5 years of experience. Everyone is going to do great.
22 hours from now.
Reflections on my last day of being pregnant
Posted by
Fallon
at
Sunday, April 17, 2011
3 comments:
What a beautiful blog post, Fallon!! I'm crying but... they're good & happy tears.
:`````-)
I have been... and will continue to... pray for you, my dearest firstborn. It's one of the hardest things in all the world, to watch your daughter heading into something that is dangerous (surgery is NEVER "routine"... ever!)... painful... uncertain. I wish I could go through that c-section tomorrow for you, honey, and then just hand you the baby when it was finished. But that's not how life is, is it. We each have our own paths to walk down & experience... some good, some not-so-good, and some painful but wonderful all rolled into one.
:-)
Show em how it's done, sweetheart. I'll be here, watching YOUR firstborn, as she goes from being an only child to a big sister. If she is even half as grand & wonderful a big sister as you are, she will have accomplished much.
I love you, honey, and that love will be with you tomorrow as you go into surgery. I hope you can feel my arms around you because they surely will be. God bless you on this part of your life's journey.
Love forever~ Maw-Daw
xoxoxoxo
Congrats Fallon =) The best part about the second baby is you actually get to enjoy the baby versus being scared and nervous about having the baby. ;) Can't wait to see pictures! Speedy recovery to you!
These Last Few Hours
It is important to me
that I spend a part
of the next few hours
here alone with you,
in the darkness.
You and I will never be
this close again.
Soon you will be
a tiny person
all on your own.
No longer the kicking,
demanding bulge in my body
that I have grown to love so much.
I pray that you will be safely guided
on your journey to my arms.
And I ask for the strength, courage and
power of birthing,
to open my body and mind for you
and ever so gently us, as one, will become two.
~Author Unknown
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